Ugh, okay, what’s been going on. I found some irradiated whiskey in Camp Searchlight. I pondered taking it for some time, because of its status as “irradiated.” It occurred me that every goddamn thing I touch is irradiated and that for something to be actually marked as such at this point, then the irradiation must be at motherfuck you levels that require caution beyond my usual apprehensiveness (usually none.) Then the part of me that loves whiskey kicked in and I grabbed every bottle I could. And the scotch too. Gimme gimme gimme gimme gimme. And this irradiated Cram, because I might as well.
Then, since V-Ron’s been following me around wearing my vintage armor (GODDAMMIT), I finally decided to go handle some of this shit with the Brotherhood of Steel. Well guess who needs some fucking errands run. Go check on this squad, go check on that squad. They’re all DEAD.
Oh and I had to go to that one Repconn building. With all the robots hovering around asking me if I need anything. Not that I could tell them if I DID. They just hover there.
TELL ME A JOKE ROBOT! MY OLD ROBOT TOLD ME JOKES. WHERE ARE ALL MY FREE JOKES? WHERE IS MY PURIFIED WATER? MY HAIRCUTS? WHY DO YOU ASK ME IF I NEED SOMETHING WHEN YOU WILL NOT PROVIDE EVEN IF I DID?
Anyway, then go check this guy, go talk to that guy. What the fuck ever. Now will you pretty please go to some Vaults and get some stufffff for us?
They need their filtration system fixed and thankfully I already picked up one of the parts when I was in Vault 34. I look and see that another part is in Vault 3 and that I had missed while killing all those fiends. So, back there I go.
Inside, I discovered the most wonderful thing. I missed not just those parts. But an entire WING of the vault. Hurray! I go inside and make with the murdering and uh, more murdering. And then I found a room ripe for throwing stuff around and making a mess. There were three boxes of billiard balls, two shelves of pool cues, a box of baseballs. All of which ended up on the floor, very quickly.
Then I tried to see how many of those boxes I could stack up. I got 5 in big stack, went for a 6th and the stack fell over. I yelled JENGA! and left the vault.
Afterwards I didn’t really want to go after the third thing, so I drank a bunch of whiskey and meandered a bit. I found a barn with an ant mound in it, and then discovered I could go INSIDE the ant mound. Well I almost threw up right there. That is fucking disgusting. Why did I do this, why did crawl inside an goddamn ant mound? Oh god I think their weird little webby shit is in my hair. *BLLLEEEEAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH*
Inside, I found a bunch of ants and an ant queen and I killed all of them even though I was the one breaking into their home and they really didn’t have much I want. THEY DESERVED DEATH.
FOR BEING SO DISGUSTING.